Malema faked matric results, report says

    Sources at the department of higher education say EFF leader Julius Malema faked his matric results to keep out of the spotlight.

    One source told the Daily Vox on condition of anonymity that Malema had specifically asked for his school results to be dumbed down “in fear of being taken seriously”.

    “Think of it in the way Jesus pretended to be a carpenter,” the source said.

    Malema has been in hot water over the past few weeks over a series of allegations including assault, pointing a firearm and damage to property. He is currently under investigation by the National Prosecuting Authority (NPA).

    Mbuyiseni Ndlozi, spokesperson of the EFF, said it was not the first time Malema had been accused of doctoring his results but added that this was nothing more than a purposeful attempt to malign their leader.

    “There is nothing more fearful to white people that a clever black man,” Ndlozi said. “We want to assure you that this is not the case.”

    When contacted for comment, the ANC said the allegations were baseless and described the Department of Education as fool-proof.

     

    Abu O’Well is an almost an award-winning satirist with the Daily Vox. Read more of his writing here.